I had an obsession with chopsticks for a while, and I ended up writing this. There's a pic of Tabe by Lyfe in the Other section.
Chopsticks - starring Tabe Banbutsu
(c) 2004 Nikolas K. Vulper
Tabe is a slightly chubby, light purple fox. The odd fur tone came from a gene mutation between his white furred Japanese father and his red furred American mother. But he's an All American fox. At least that's what his parents tell him. He's actually a second generation citizen. His parents have shunned Japanese culture, leaving him with very little knowledge of his homeland.
His grandfather, the only connection to his Japanese heritage, has been very ill. He gave the young Banbutsu two sets of chopsticks while in the hospital. Tabe found the gift strange since he'd never even eaten asian food. Truth be told he enjoyed having something Asian, since his father wouldn't even let him watch anime.
Time passed, and his grandfather's condition worsened. Tabe attempted to use the chopsticks at dinner one night, and was severely scolded by his father. They didn't work very well for hamburgers anyway, though he did eat a few of the fries with them.
After that outburst, Tabe kept them hidden. He played with them from time to time, slowly getting accustomed to their use, picking up and moving anything in his room he could snatch between them. After a while he could use both sets at once, using all four to pick up pretty big and heavy stuff. He was amazed that the wood never bent in the slightest, he figured it was something in the black stain on them.
He never pulled them out in front of his father until the wake for his grandfather. He finally got to meet some of his family from Japan, and hear his native tongue. He had no idea what baka meant, but it sure did seem to rile his father up when his cousins said it.
The food was amazing. His cousins had made so many things that he had never had in his life. The sauces, the meats, everything was in such a different style. They seemed impressed with how he wielded the chopsticks, and just kept putting dishes down in front of him. His favorite had to be the sushi, though it was all irresistible. Eventually his father pulled him away and took him home, sending him to bed with an overstuffed belly.
He was awoken the next day by his father sitting down at the foot of his bed. "Son. Wake up." His father so seldomly called him by name, thinking back he could count the times on one hand.
"Yeah dad?"
"Enjoy yourself yesterday?"
"Yes I did, that food was amazing."
"Well, I need to talk to you about that. Do you know what your name means?"
"Well no, I don't even remember the name of half of the stuff I ate yesterday."
"Tabe is short for Taberu, it's the japanese word for eating. Your grandfather named you, he thought it was funny."
"Why would he find that funny?"
"He was a sumo. It's a sport in Japan, kind of like wrestling. The competitors are very bulky, they eat a lot, it helps them to perform. He always said his favorite part of the job was eating, so he wanted to name you Tabe."
"Why are you telling me all of this now Dad?"
"We have a genetic defect son, it's a reaction to the soy that's used in Asian cooking. Your grandfather used to weigh over 500 pounds when he was a sumo. That's why I never had you eat those kind of foods, they will make you very fat."
Tabe chuckled at his father, not believing the story, until his father showed him an old photograph. There was his grandfather, in full sumo garb, looking even heavier than his father said.
"Now it's time to go to school, just remember what will happen if you eat asian food."
Tabe got dressed quickly, then looked at the picture again. "I don't see what's so bad about that..."
He got to class just barely on time, but he couldn't get his mind on Chemistry. He almost skipped his math class, but he knew it wouldn't be worth it since the dining hall wasn't open yet. As soon as class was over he zipped to the dining hall, and it was pizza day. Tabe loved pizza day, he grabbed a couple of slices and plopped down by his friends.
Something wasn't right when he started eating. He nibbled at the pizza, but it just didn't taste good. So he pulled out the chopsticks and tried eating it in the hold of the sticks. Still wasn't any good.
"Dude Tabe, those are some awesome chopsticks. I thought you didn't eat asian food?"
"I finally tried some this weekend... where's that buffet you guys always go to?"
"It's down on Liberty, near the arcade."
"Oh, alright, I gotta go."
Tabe sprung up from the table, grabbed his things and then zipped out of the cafeteria, leaving his friends quite confused. After they finished their meals, Kevin and Sarah decided to check up on him, figuring he went to the buffet.
They found him sitting out in front, looking rather angry.
"What happened?"
"They kicked me out. Said I was eating too much. I only had a tray of orange chicken."
"A whole tray? Well, at least you got your money's worth. You gonna be alright?"
Tabe patted his belly a bit and grinned, "Yeah, guess I'm just making up for a lifetime of no Asian cuisine. I'll see you guys tonight for the chemistry test."
His friends wandered off and Tabe rubbed over his belly. Still hungry, and he was obviously not getting back into the buffet. He suddenly remembered that there was a sushi place nearby. He hopped up and walked past an ATM from his bank.
"Well, grandfather's inheritance check should have cleared by now. I think he would have wanted me to spend it this way." He took out $300, the maximum he could, and headed over to the sushi place.
Looking over the menu, he was mainly looking at the prices, figuring if something was expensive there would be a lot of it. He found something for $60 and decided that's what he'd get.
"All that, just for you?"
"Yes please."
He took a seat and waited, and was pleasantly surprised when they carried over a wooden ship that was covered with sushi. There had to be over 200 pieces on the thing. The wait staff seemed to be staring at him, amazed that one guy would order so much. Tabe grinned and dug in, taking to it with both sets of chopsticks.
"Try with soy sauce," said one waitress, "it will be better."
Tabe took her advice and splashed some soy sauce on his next few pieces, then after sampling, he doused the entire boat in sauce. He inhaled the rest of the contents of the sushi boat, and once it was bare he smiled at the staff who all walked off, except for his waitress.
"... anything else today?" she asked, looking almost frightened that he would say yes.
"No, just the check please."
She bowed and walked off. Tabe grinned, he was finally feeling full. He saw a few scraps of rice and fish on the boat, and decided to finish it off. Picking it up in his paws, he licked at it, mmmming as his tongue ran over some of the soy sauce he had splashed on it. Without thinking, he started to gnaw at the boat and took a bite of it, just as the manager came by with the bill.
"What are you doing? That boat costs two hundred dollars! It's not to eat!"
Tabe freaked out, and not wanting a repeat of the Chinese restaurant, he laid his money on the tabletop, and ran out with the boat in hand. He ducked into an alley and looked at the boat again, clearly seeing his own teethmarks through the wood.
He sniffed at it again, then licked, then he bit. It tasted wonderful, though he had no idea why. So he just kept eating it, piece by piece until the whole thing was in his belly. Then he looked at himself, he hadn't realized what effect this was having on him. He felt like he had gained at least 50 pounds. Then his belly rumbled again.
"I can not be hungry... this makes no sense." He pulled out his wallet, he still had $10 in there. So he walked to the grocery store and picked up a few things, deciding to take them home to eat.
He drove back home, and his parents weren't home from work yet. So he ran into his room. Out of the grocery bag he pulled a couple of bottles of soy sauce. "Might as well try this out."
First he looked over to his plushes. Holding his chopsticks in the right paw and a bottle in the left, he splashed all of them with the sauce. First he picked up his teddy bear and quickly swallowed it down. Then his animals, a wolf, a cat, a fox, a hippo. He pulled out his other set of sticks and started stuffing down the larger ones.
Soon, they were all gone. So he went to his closet and started eating his clothes. Not like they were going to fit anymore. Once those were gone, he ate his games, his movies, his music collection. All of his toys from atop his dresser and desk. He ate his sheets, his pillows, and then found himself with nothing else that he could swallow whole.
He decided to look around the house, but upon standing up, he realized the problem with that idea. As his belly had been growing, his body decided to play catchup. His ears were grazing the ceiling, which meant he was almost eight feet tall. Opening his bedroom door, he found he was both too tall and too wide to fit back through it. He had a problem on his hands.
Being stuck was a problem, but his hunger was the more pressing need. He kneeled down, and after splashing them all, he ate his dresser, desk, and his entire bed. While feasting, he didn't hear his dad pull up, and was totally surprised to find him barging his way in. Not wanting to bother with a lecture, Tabe grabbed his dad with the chopsticks and stuffed him down, a hearty swallow polishing him off.
Tabe then sat back against the wall, with an open door to the left that he can't fit through, and windows to the right he definitely can't squeeze through. Everything edible in reach was in his belly, including his father who was putting up quite a fight, making Tabe giggle as his fattened middle jiggled. He then contemplated the chopsticks that had made all of this possible, and while looking them over realized that they had grown with him.
But his belly rumbled to tell him it was not the time to muse. He looked at the floor and a little pool of soy sauce on the carpet. He poked at it with his chopsticks, and felt that it had some give. So he pushed harder until it gave way, making a little hole to the basement. He rooted his nose around the hole and with a leverage point, he started munching on the floor. Soon the hole was big enough for him to slip down into the basement. From this position, he was able to munch at the walls that were keeping him in his room. His chopsticks became an option again, so he reached into the living room and grabbed the sofa, the chairs, the television. Next he gobbled up all of the appliances in the kitchen. Having swallowed anything large enough to matter, he took to eating the floor again.
After a while, the house started to cave under its own weight since the supports were being eaten, and the whole thing collapsed on top of Tabe. This didn't phase him, he just crawled out and layed down in his front yard and started devouring everything that had fallen into his basement. It made quite the convenient bowl now. Soon enough, his whole house was inside of his belly. Next he ate a few of the neighbors cars, quite a few of the neighbors, and even uprooted some trees with his chopsticks. But everything was so small now... he needed bigger things to eat. Looking west to the setting sun, he realized it was time to take his chemistry test...